How do you measure success?
Sometimes I feel successful. I can look in the mirror or catch a glimpse of a body part as I move, and think 'Wow. Look at me."
I look and feel so…different. I notice little things…
My shoulders are slimmer. I can see my biceps. My wrists are smaller. When I lace my fingers together, I can feel the bones. Putting my hands on my hips is a much different stance than I'm used to. My legs looks smaller, clothes fit better. I have one and a half chins, not two (or three), and I'm almost half the size I was.
But then…I don't see it. I still see too much of me. Clothes don't lay the way they should. My body is not proportionate. I have that annoying layer of fat around my hips and my stomach. My legs are too big, I still am fat. Everywhere.
How can I have this pride in myself and this dismay at the same time?
How can I look in the mirror and be both happy and disappointed for the progress I've made and how far I still have to go?
I can see it…see all the amazing changes. And then they disappear, and I see all the things that desperately need changing.
Is that success? Achieving, but still wanting to do better?